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Sunday, 5 March 2006
santa -singh
**Y did santa singh sign all the cheques in his cheque
book...........
.................so that no one else could use them if
he lost his
chequebook?!!@@?


***************
**Santa : We have to learn Telugu within 6 months or
we will not be able
to communicate with my child.
Banta : Is it! Why?
Santa : We have adopted a telugu child and it will
start to speak after
6 months


***************
**How did santa singh attempt to transfer some files
from one PC to
another
PC.....

1)Right clicked the mouse on the file which he wanted
to transfer and
selected cut option
2)Disconnected the mouse from that PC
3)Took that mouse carefully and connected it to the
other PC where he
wanted to copy that file
4)And trying to paste it there....!!!!!!!!!

***************
**Once Banta got a party invitation saying..... Black
tie only !
At the party Banta was very shocked to see other
people wearing suits
also!!!!!!





Smart Indian

It is because of the business sense demonstrated below.


An Indian walks into a New York City bank and asks to see the
loan officer. He says he is going to Europe on business for two weeks
and
needs to borrow $5,000.
The bank officer says the bank will need some kind of security forsuch a
loan, so the man hands over the keys of
a new Rolls Royce parked on the street in front of the bank.
Everything is checked out, and the bank agrees to accept the
car as collateral for the loan. An employee drives the
Rolls into the bank's underground garage and parks it there.
Two weeks later, the man returns, repays the $5,000 and the
interest, which comes to $15.41. The loan officer
says, "We are very happy to have had your business, and this
transaction has worked out very nicely,but we are a
little puzzled. While you were away, we checked you out and found
that you are a multimillionaire. What puzzles us is why would you bother
to borrow $5,000?"
The Indian replied,"Where else in New York can I park my car for two
weeks
for 15 bucks?"
Cheers !

Indians are Indians......, Smart





1.MAN: I want a divorce. My wife hasn't spoken to me in six months.

LawyER: Better think it over. Wives like that are hard to get!

2.A Happy Boss tells his employeES:

You worked very hard this year. As a reward, I 'll give everyone a
cheque for Rs 5000. If you work with the same zeal next year, I'll
sign those cheques.

3.HubBY: Darling, years ago u had a figure like Coke bottle.

WiFE: Yes darling I still do, only difference is earlier it was
300ml now it's 1.5 ltr.

4.An observing him. Suddenly a star falls, seeing that Santa shoutED:

Kya nishana lagaya hai!

5.God thought that since he couldn't be everywhere he made a mother.

Then devil thought that he couldn't be everywhere he made a mother-
in-law.

6.SanTA: I'm a proud father. My son is in medical college.

BanTA: What's he studying?"

SanTA: He's not studying, they are studying him!

8.Banta sent sms to SanTA: Bhejnewala mahan, padhnewala gadha.

Santa got angry and repliED: Bhejnewala gadha, padhnewala mahan.

9.Life is a paradox-what u want u don't get(luv), what u get, u

don't enjoy(marriage), what u enjoy is not permanent(girlfriend),



what is permanent is boring(wife)

10. An SMS : Sincere ApoloGY: If u dont like any of my SMS n dont

like 2 read, then plz dont hesitate, feel free to.....





Lessons in Logic

If your father is a poor man,
it is your fate but,
if your father-in-law is a poor man,
it's your stupidity.

........................................................................
..

I was born intelligent -
education ruined me.

........................................................................
..


Practice makes perfect.....
But nobody's perfect......
so why practice?

........................................................................
..


If it's true that we are here to help others,
then what exactly are the others here for?

........................................................................
..


Since light travels faster than sound,
people appear bright until you hear them speak.

........................................................................
..


How come "abbreviated" is such a long word?

........................................................................
..


Money is not everything.
There's Mastercard & Visa.

........................................................................
..


One should love animals.
They are so tasty.

........................................................................
..


Behind every successful man, there is a woman
And behind every unsuccessful man, there are two.

........................................................................
..


Every man should marry.
After all, happiness is not the only thing in
life.

........................................................................
..


The wise never marry.
and when they marry they become otherwise.

........................................................................
..


Success is a relative term.
It brings so many relatives.

........................................................................
..


Never put off the work till tomorrow
what you can put off today.

........................................................................
..


"Your future depends on your dreams"
So go to sleep

........................................................................
..


There should be a better way to start a day
Than waking up every morning

........................................................................
..


"Hard work never killed anybody"
But why take the risk

........................................................................
..


"Work fascinates me"
I can look at it for hours

........................................................................
..


God made relatives;
Thank God we can choose our friends.

........................................................................
..


The more you learn, the more you know,
The more you know, the more you forget
The more you forget, the less you know
So.. why learn.


........................................................................
..

A bus station is where a bus stops.

A train station is where a train stops.

On my desk, I have a work station....
what more can I say........

----------

What do you get when you cross a lawyer and a pig?

Nothing, there's some things even a pig won't do!



----------

A couple was planning on getting married. Seeing how they didn't
have much money to go on a honeymoon, they decided tojust go back
to their new apartment after the wedding.

The groom had three close friends, that were prone to committing
practical jokes. One being a carpenter, the other a ordinary guy,
and the third a dentist.

They all decided to pull practical jokes on their newly married
friends. The carpenter decided he would cut the slats in the bed
so that when they climbed into bed, the bed would collapse. The
ordinary guy decided to short sheet the bed, so that when they got
into it their feet wouldn't reach the bottom. The dentist chuckled
and wouldn't tell anyone what he planned to do.

A week later the 3 friends all received letters in the mail. "Dear
friends, we didn't mind the fact that when we got into bed, the
bed collapsed, or the guy that short sheeted it, but I'm gonna kill
the bastard that put the novacaine in the vaseline!"



YOUR QuOTE:


remote Posted by abs at 4:46 PM

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